話說李懷春到了濟公面前說：「師父久違了，弟子有禮。今日秦公子得了奇異病症，我把你老人家薦了去給公子治病。不論甚麼事，都看在弟子份上。」濟公說：「好李懷春！你要給人治病，都拿鎖子鎖了去呀！」李懷春一看說：「好，秦大人，請你老人家派人把聖僧鐵鏈撤去。」秦相立刻把和尚鏈子撤去了。李懷春說：「師父，你老人家可沒有別的話說了。走罷。」和尚說：「李先生，我師父、師兄、師弟都在這裏受罪，我哪有心來給人治病？」那秦相聽見，立刻叫把眾僧人都放回廟去罷。眾僧人走了，李懷春說：「師父，你老人家可沒的說了，走罷。」濟公說：「李先生，兵圍靈隱寺，拆毀我廟中大碑樓，我要給人治病。我哪能情願呀？」秦相知道和尚要把兵撤回來，他也沒有話說，連忙吩咐手下人去傳堂諭：「去把拆樓之人一併撤回，連兵丁也撤回來。」李懷春說：「聖僧，你老人家可沒有話說了，走罷。」和尚說：「走。」站起來說：
「行善積福作德，作惡必遭奇禍，貧僧前來度群魔，祇怕令人難測。」
和尚談笑自若，秦相想：「和尚放蕩不拘，真要把我兒的病給治好了，我要不拆他大碑樓，我是被人恥笑，他白打了我的管家，我白把他鎖來。就是他把我兒的病治好了，我也要拆他的大碑樓。」濟公在後面哈哈大笑說：「好好，善哉！善哉！我和尚唱個歌給大人聽罷：
话说李怀春到了济公面前说：「师父久违了，弟子有礼。今日秦公子得了奇异病症，我把你老人家荐了去给公子治病。不论甚么事，都看在弟子份上。」济公说：「好李怀春！你要给人治病，都拿锁子锁了去呀！」李怀春一看说：「好，秦大人，请你老人家派人把圣僧铁链撤去。」秦相立刻把和尚链子撤去了。李怀春说：「师父，你老人家可没有别的话说了。走罢。」和尚说：「李先生，我师父、师兄、师弟都在这里受罪，我哪有心来给人治病？」那秦相听见，立刻叫把众僧人都放回庙去罢。众僧人走了，李怀春说：「师父，你老人家可没的说了，走罢。」济公说：「李先生，兵围灵隐寺，拆毁我庙中大碑楼，我要给人治病。我哪能情愿呀？」秦相知道和尚要把兵撤回来，他也没有话说，连忙吩咐手下人去传堂谕：「去把拆楼之人一并撤回，连兵丁也撤回来。」李怀春说：「圣僧，你老人家可没有话说了，走罢。」和尚说：「走。」站起来说：
「行善积福作德，作恶必遭奇祸，贫僧前来度群魔，祇怕令人难测。」
和尚谈笑自若，秦相想：「和尚放荡不拘，真要把我儿的病给治好了，我要不拆他大碑楼，我是被人耻笑，他白打了我的管家，我白把他锁来。就是他把我儿的病治好了，我也要拆他的大碑楼。」济公在后面哈哈大笑说：「好好，善哉！善哉！我和尚唱个歌给大人听罢：
Now, Li Huaichun came up to Ji Gong and said, “Master, it’s been a long time. Your disciple pays his respects. Today Young Master Qin has come down with a strange illness, and I’ve recommended you, venerable sir, to treat him. Whatever has happened, please let it go for your disciple’s sake.” “Fine, Li Huaichun!” said Ji Gong. “When you want somebody to treat a patient, you have him fetched in chains, do you?” Li Huaichun looked, and said, “Well, Lord Qin, please have someone take the iron chain off the holy monk.” Chancellor Qin at once had the monk’s chain taken off. “Master,” said Li Huaichun, “now you’ve nothing more to say, venerable sir. Let’s go.” “Li Huaichun,” said the monk, “my master and my elder and younger brothers in the order are all suffering here. How can I have any heart for treating patients?” When Chancellor Qin heard this, he at once ordered all the monks set free and sent back to their temple. When the monks had gone, Li Huaichun said, “Master, now you’ve nothing to say. Let’s go.” “Li Huaichun,” said Ji Gong, “troops are surrounding Lingyin Temple and pulling down the Great Stele Tower in our temple, and I’m to go and treat a patient? How could I be willing?” Chancellor Qin understood that the monk wanted the troops withdrawn. He had nothing to say to that, and hurriedly told his men to carry an order from the hall: “Go and call back everyone who is pulling down the tower, and withdraw the soldiers as well.” “Holy monk,” said Li Huaichun, “now you’ve nothing more to say, venerable sir. Let’s go.” “Let’s go,” said the monk. He stood up and said,
“Do good, and you store up blessing and virtue;do evil, and strange disaster is sure to follow.This poor monk has come to save a horde of demons —I only fear it’s more than anyone can fathom.”
The monk talked and laughed as if nothing were the matter. Chancellor Qin thought, “This monk is wild and unruly. Even if he really does cure my son, if I don’t pull down his Great Stele Tower, people will laugh at me: he’ll have beaten my steward for nothing, and I’ll have had him brought here in chains for nothing. Even if he cures my son, I’ll still pull down his Great Stele Tower.” Behind him, Ji Gong roared with laughter. “Good, good! Excellent! Excellent! This monk will sing Your Lordship a song:
皂帽絲絛第一人，難略紫綬羅袍，一品還嫌小。量盡海波濤，人心難忖著。翠養翎毛，謂誰頭上好。豕養脂膏，謂誰腸肉飽。千尋鳥道上雲霄，是處都經到。平地好逍遙，世人知事回頭少。
皂帽丝绦第一人，难略紫绶罗袍，一品还嫌小。量尽海波涛，人心难忖着。翠养翎毛，谓谁头上好。豕养脂膏，谓谁肠肉饱。千寻鸟道上云霄，是处都经到。平地好逍遥，世人知事回头少。
First man in black cap and silken sash, still loath to forgo the purple ribbon and gauze robe — even the first rank seems too small.You may measure every wave of the sea,but the heart of man is hard to fathom.The kingfisher grows its plumes —to look fine on whose head?The hog grows its fat —to fill whose belly?Up bird-tracks a thousand fathoms high into the clouds,there’s nowhere they haven’t been.Yet on level ground one could roam at ease;few in this world have the sense to turn back.
和尚一唱山歌，秦相暗暗點頭，知道這和尚甚是明白。一同來至西花園秦桓的書房，聽秦桓在那裏咳嗽不止。和尚到了屋中一瞧，說：「喲，原來是這麼大的腦袋，可了不得！」李懷春聽和尚這話大吃一驚，心說：「費這大事，把他請來，他若不能治，可就糟了。」秦相也是一驚，連忙問道：「和尚你會治不會治？」和尚說：「會治。不要緊，這是三小號，我連頭號大腦袋都能治。這病有個名，叫大頭瓮。」說著話，和尚伸手往兜囊一摸，說：「可了不得了，我把藥丟了！」秦相說：「甚麼藥？」和尚說：「治大頭瓮的藥。」秦相一聽一愣，說：「和尚，莫非是你來到我這相府，就知道我兒長大頭瓮麼？」和尚說：「不是。祇因有一位王員外，他兒子也得這個病。每逢得這個病，必不是好人，定在外面行凶作惡，搶佔少婦長女，纔有此病。王員外兒子不法，得了大頭瓮，請我去治。我帶了藥剛要去，被相爺派人把我和尚鎖來。我進相府的時候，摸兜子藥還有呢，這時候會沒有了！」秦相吩咐：「爾等快給和尚去找藥！」眾家人一聽，說：「和尚，你這藥是丸藥？是麵子藥？告訴我們，好找去。」濟顛說：「是顆丸藥，有小米粒大，像瓜皮顏色，也沒有紙包著。」眾家人一聽說：「我去罷。」和尚說：「大人，他這病可有轉，這是小三號，要一轉了大腦袋，就沒法治。」秦相說：「那怎麼辦呢？」和尚說：「我得吃飽了再治，要不吃飽了治，越治越冤。」秦相一聽，怕兒子轉冤大頭，趕忙吩咐家人擺酒，在大廳上擺下三桌酒，讓和尚先行奔廳上去吃酒，吃完了再治病。李懷春同著和尚來至廳上，和尚一看是三桌酒，並不謙不讓，就在正面上頭落坐。秦相一看，雖是心中有些不快，暗想道：「這個和尚是有點來歷，我如今為當朝的宰相，他竟佔我的上座。」秦相也沒法，祇可主座相陪，倒讓李懷春在東首坐下。
和尚一唱山歌，秦相暗暗点头，知道这和尚甚是明白。一同来至西花园秦桓的书房，听秦桓在那里咳嗽不止。和尚到了屋中一瞧，说：「哟，原来是这么大的脑袋，可了不得！」李怀春听和尚这话大吃一惊，心说：「费这大事，把他请来，他若不能治，可就糟了。」秦相也是一惊，连忙问道：「和尚你会治不会治？」和尚说：「会治。不要紧，这是三小号，我连头号大脑袋都能治。这病有个名，叫大头瓮。」说着话，和尚伸手往兜囊一摸，说：「可了不得了，我把药丢了！」秦相说：「甚么药？」和尚说：「治大头瓮的药。」秦相一听一愣，说：「和尚，莫非是你来到我这相府，就知道我儿长大头瓮么？」和尚说：「不是。祇因有一位王员外，他儿子也得这个病。每逢得这个病，必不是好人，定在外面行凶作恶，抢占少妇长女，才有此病。王员外儿子不法，得了大头瓮，请我去治。我带了药刚要去，被相爷派人把我和尚锁来。我进相府的时候，摸兜子药还有呢，这时候会没有了！」秦相吩咐：「尔等快给和尚去找药！」众家人一听，说：「和尚，你这药是丸药？是面子药？告诉我们，好找去。」济颠说：「是颗丸药，有小米粒大，像瓜皮颜色，也没有纸包着。」众家人一听说：「我去罢。」和尚说：「大人，他这病可有转，这是小三号，要一转了大脑袋，就没法治。」秦相说：「那怎么办呢？」和尚说：「我得吃饱了再治，要不吃饱了治，越治越冤。」秦相一听，怕儿子转冤大头，赶忙吩咐家人摆酒，在大厅上摆下三桌酒，让和尚先行奔厅上去吃酒，吃完了再治病。李怀春同着和尚来至厅上，和尚一看是三桌酒，并不谦不让，就在正面上头落坐。秦相一看，虽是心中有些不快，暗想道：「这个和尚是有点来历，我如今为当朝的宰相，他竟占我的上座。」秦相也没法，祇可主座相陪，倒让李怀春在东首坐下。
When the monk sang his mountain song, Chancellor Qin nodded quietly to himself: the monk, he saw, understood things very well. Together they came to Qin Huan’s study in the West Garden, and could hear Qin Huan inside, coughing without stop. The monk went into the room, took one look and said, “Whoa! So it’s a head this big. This is terrible!” Li Huaichun was badly startled to hear him say so. “All this trouble to get him here,” he thought, “and if he can’t cure it, we’re done for.” Chancellor Qin was startled too, and quickly asked, “Monk, can you cure it or not?” “I can,” said the monk. “Nothing to worry about. This is only a size-three small. I can cure even a size-one big head. The illness has a name: it’s called Big-Head Jar.” As he spoke, the monk reached into his pouch and felt about. “Oh, this is terrible. I’ve lost the medicine!” “What medicine?” said Chancellor Qin. “The medicine for Big-Head Jar,” said the monk. Chancellor Qin was taken aback. “Monk, can it be that you knew before you came to my mansion that my son had Big-Head Jar?” “No,” said the monk. “It’s just that there’s a Squire Wang whose son has the same illness. Whoever gets this illness is never a good man. He’s sure to have been out doing violence and evil, carrying off young wives and grown daughters — that’s the only way he gets it. Squire Wang’s son broke the law and got Big-Head Jar, and they asked me to cure him. I was just about to set off with the medicine when Your Excellency’s men put this monk in chains and brought me here. When I came into the mansion I felt my pouch, and the medicine was still there. Now it’s gone!” Chancellor Qin gave orders. “You there, go and find the monk’s medicine, quick!” Hearing this, the servants said, “Monk, is this medicine of yours a pill? Or a powder? Tell us, so we can find it.” “It’s a pill,” said Crazy Ji, “about the size of a grain of millet, the colour of melon rind, and it isn’t wrapped in paper either.” The servants heard this. “Off we go, then,” they said. “Your Lordship,” said the monk, “his illness can still turn. This is a size-three small. Once it turns into a big head, there’ll be no curing it.” “Then what’s to be done?” said Chancellor Qin. “I have to eat my fill before I treat him,” said the monk. “If I treat him hungry, the more I treat him, the more of a sucker’s head it’ll get.” Hearing this, Chancellor Qin was afraid his son’s head would turn into a sucker’s big head, and hurriedly ordered the servants to set out wine. Three tables of wine were laid in the main hall, and the monk was asked to go there first and drink, and to treat the patient when he had finished. Li Huaichun went with the monk to the hall. The monk saw the three tables of wine, and without any polite show of declining, sat himself down at the head of the table in the place of honour. Chancellor Qin saw this, and though somewhat put out, he thought to himself, “This monk must be somebody. I am chancellor of the reigning court, and he simply takes the seat above me.” There was nothing Chancellor Qin could do. He could only keep him company from the host’s seat, and asked Li Huaichun to sit on the east side.
和尚酒過三巡說：「大人這個悶酒沒喝頭。」秦相說：「依你便該如何，可以不吃悶酒呢？」和尚說：「出個燈謎，說個酒令，對個對子，批個字意，都可解悶。」秦相說：「和尚，你還認得字麼？」濟公說：「不敢云認字，也略識一兩個。」秦相說：「要說酒令，是喝酒，是賭甚麼？」和尚說：「不贏酒。大人出個對句，我和尚如對上，我贏大人一萬兩銀子﹔要對不上，我和尚輸一萬兩銀子。大人想我一個窮和尚要輸了，哪有一萬現銀子？我要輸了，大人不是要拆我那個大碑樓麼？我要輸了，把大碑樓給大人好不好？」秦相一聽，心中甚為欣悅，說：「和尚，我先試試你的文理，要真有才學，我再跟你打賭。我先出兩個字你對。」和尚說：「大人說罷。」秦相說：「幽齋。」和尚說：「對茅廬。」秦相點了頭說：「開窗。」和尚就對「閉戶」。秦相說：「讀書。」和尚說「寫字」。秦相說：「和尚你輸了。我這六個字湊成一處，成一句話，是﹔幽齋開窗讀書。」和尚說：「我那六個字也是一句話，湊成一處。是：茅廬閉戶寫字。」秦相說：「我給你出個拆字法的對子，你對上，我輸你一萬銀子。」和尚說：「也好。」秦相說：
「酉卒是個醉，目垂是個睡，李太白懷抱酒罈在山坡睡。不曉他是醉，不曉他是睡。」
和尚吃了一盃酒，哈哈大笑說：「這個對子好對！
月長是個脹，月半是個胖，秦夫人懷抱大肚在滿院逛。不曉他是脹，不曉他是胖。」
秦相一聽連搖手，說道：「和尚不要詼諧。」秦相想：「這個和尚真淘氣。我再出個對子，叫他知道我秦相本是滿腹文章，懷揣錦繡，腹隱珠璣。」大人說：「佛祖解絨絛，捆和尚扣顛僧。」濟公說：「哎呀，大人這個對子可真好，我和尚才疏學淺。」秦相說：「你對上，我再輸銀一萬﹔對不上，我要拆你的大碑樓。」和尚說：「好。」喝了一盃酒說：「我對一個天子抖玉鎖，拿大臣擒丞相。又贏你一萬兩！」
和尚酒过三巡说：「大人这个闷酒没喝头。」秦相说：「依你便该如何，可以不吃闷酒呢？」和尚说：「出个灯谜，说个酒令，对个对子，批个字意，都可解闷。」秦相说：「和尚，你还认得字么？」济公说：「不敢云认字，也略识一两个。」秦相说：「要说酒令，是喝酒，是赌甚么？」和尚说：「不赢酒。大人出个对句，我和尚如对上，我赢大人一万两银子﹔要对不上，我和尚输一万两银子。大人想我一个穷和尚要输了，哪有一万现银子？我要输了，大人不是要拆我那个大碑楼么？我要输了，把大碑楼给大人好不好？」秦相一听，心中甚为欣悦，说：「和尚，我先试试你的文理，要真有才学，我再跟你打赌。我先出两个字你对。」和尚说：「大人说罢。」秦相说：「幽斋。」和尚说：「对茅庐。」秦相点了头说：「开窗。」和尚就对「闭户」。秦相说：「读书。」和尚说「写字」。秦相说：「和尚你输了。我这六个字凑成一处，成一句话，是﹔幽斋开窗读书。」和尚说：「我那六个字也是一句话，凑成一处。是：茅庐闭户写字。」秦相说：「我给你出个拆字法的对子，你对上，我输你一万银子。」和尚说：「也好。」秦相说：
「酉卒是个醉，目垂是个睡，李太白怀抱酒坛在山坡睡。不晓他是醉，不晓他是睡。」
和尚吃了一杯酒，哈哈大笑说：「这个对子好对！
月长是个胀，月半是个胖，秦夫人怀抱大肚在满院逛。不晓他是胀，不晓他是胖。」
秦相一听连摇手，说道：「和尚不要诙谐。」秦相想：「这个和尚真淘气。我再出个对子，叫他知道我秦相本是满腹文章，怀揣锦绣，腹隐珠玑。」大人说：「佛祖解绒绦，捆和尚扣颠僧。」济公说：「哎呀，大人这个对子可真好，我和尚才疏学浅。」秦相说：「你对上，我再输银一万﹔对不上，我要拆你的大碑楼。」和尚说：「好。」喝了一杯酒说：「我对一个天子抖玉锁，拿大臣擒丞相。又赢你一万两！」
When the wine had gone round three times, the monk said, “Your Lordship, there’s no fun in drinking glum like this.” “Then what would you have us do,” said Chancellor Qin, “so that we aren’t drinking glum?” “Set a lantern riddle, play a drinking game, match a couplet, take a character apart — any of those will cheer us up,” said the monk. “Monk, can you even read?” said Chancellor Qin. “I wouldn’t dare say I can read,” said Ji Gong, “but I know a character or two.” “If it’s a drinking game,” said Chancellor Qin, “do we play for drinks, or what do we wager?” “Not for drinks,” said the monk. “Your Lordship sets the first line of a couplet. If this monk can match it, I win ten thousand taels of silver from Your Lordship; if I can’t, this monk loses ten thousand taels of silver. Your Lordship is thinking: if a poor monk like me loses, where would he find ten thousand in ready silver? Well, doesn’t Your Lordship want to pull down that Great Stele Tower of mine? If I lose, I’ll give Your Lordship the Great Stele Tower. How about that?” Chancellor Qin was delighted to hear it. “Monk, first I’ll test your learning. If you really have some talent, then I’ll make the wager with you. I’ll start by giving you two characters to match.” “Go ahead, Your Lordship,” said the monk. “Secluded study,” said Chancellor Qin. “I match it with ‘thatched hut’,” said the monk. Chancellor Qin nodded. “Open the window.” The monk matched it with “shut the door”. “Read books,” said Chancellor Qin. “Write characters,” said the monk. “Monk, you’ve lost,” said Chancellor Qin. “Put my six characters together and they make one sentence: ‘In the secluded study, open the window and read books.’” “My six characters make a sentence too, when you put them together,” said the monk. “It goes: ‘In the thatched hut, shut the door and write characters.’” “I’ll give you a couplet of the split-the-character kind,” said Chancellor Qin. “If you can match it, I lose ten thousand in silver to you.” “All right,” said the monk. Chancellor Qin said:
“Put ‘jar’ by ‘soldier’ and you get ‘drunk’;put ‘eye’ by ‘droop’ and you get ‘asleep’.Li Taibai, hugging a wine jar, sleeps on a hillside.You can’t tell if he’s drunk,you can’t tell if he’s asleep.”
The monk drank a cup of wine and laughed out loud. “That one’s easy to match!
Put ‘moon’ by ‘long’ and you get ‘bloated’;put ‘moon’ by ‘half’ and you get ‘fat’.Madam Qin, hugging her big belly, strolls all round the courtyard.You can’t tell if she’s bloated,you can’t tell if she’s fat.”
Chancellor Qin waved his hands over and over. “Monk, no joking.” He thought, “This monk really is a rascal. I’ll set him another couplet and show him that I, Qin, have a belly full of letters, a bosom lined with brocade and pearls of wit stored away inside.” His Lordship said, “The Buddha unties his woollen sash to bind the monk and truss up the crazy monk.” “Oh my,” said Ji Gong, “Your Lordship, that really is a fine couplet. This monk has little talent and less learning.” “If you match it, I lose another ten thousand in silver,” said Chancellor Qin. “If you can’t, I pull down your Great Stele Tower.” “Fine,” said the monk. He drank a cup of wine and said, “I match it with: ‘The Son of Heaven shakes out his jade chain to seize the minister and arrest the Chancellor.’ That’s another ten thousand I’ve won off you!”
秦相想：「和尚果然滿腹奇才。對對子贏不了他。」方纔說：「和尚不用對對子，出酒令吧。」和尚說：「出酒令就出酒令。大人說的，還是大人出。」秦相說：「我要說兩個古人，兩種物件。這兩個古人要一樣的臉膛，做事相同，落在兩件物件上，要一活一死的。說上來算贏，說不上來算輸。」和尚說：「大人先說吧。」秦相說：「和尚，你聽我道來，你要聽著。
遠看一座樓，近看一隻牛，呂洞賓醉臥岳陽樓，孫臏架拐騎牛。」
和尚說：
「遠看一座廬，近看一尾魚，張飛顧廬，敬德吊魚。」
秦相說：「和尚，你輸了一萬。張飛顧廬，三顧茅廬還可以說。敬德吊魚，魚哪有腿？」和尚說：「甲魚不是有四條腿？」秦相無法，又讓和尚贏了一萬。秦相想：「我總要想法贏他。」出來告訴秦安：「你拿個捧盒裝點涼糕，你在外面等著叫和尚猜。他要猜盒子裏沒東西，你裝著涼糕拿進去，他要猜有東西，你拿空盒子進去。」秦安點頭。秦相回到裏面說：「和尚，我久聞你能掐會算，善知過去未來之事。我已派家人去拿個盒子來你猜，猜盒子裏有東西沒有。你要猜著，我照數輸給你一萬銀子，如猜不著，我要拆你的大碑樓。」和尚說：「大人，你輸急了吧？」秦相說：「我並非是輸急了，我倒要試試你的能為。」和尚喝了一盃酒，定了定神說道：
「秦大人出的主意高，這件事情真奇巧，捧盒本是空空物──」
這第三句，和尚拉著長聲。秦安聽和尚說是空空物，把涼糕裝上拿進來。剛走進來，和尚又說道：「裏面裝的是涼糕。」秦安一聽一愣，到底被和尚猜著。
秦相想：「和尚果然满腹奇才。对对子赢不了他。」方才说：「和尚不用对对子，出酒令吧。」和尚说：「出酒令就出酒令。大人说的，还是大人出。」秦相说：「我要说两个古人，两种物件。这两个古人要一样的脸膛，做事相同，落在两件物件上，要一活一死的。说上来算赢，说不上来算输。」和尚说：「大人先说吧。」秦相说：「和尚，你听我道来，你要听着。
远看一座楼，近看一只牛，吕洞宾醉卧岳阳楼，孙膑架拐骑牛。」
和尚说：
「远看一座庐，近看一尾鱼，张飞顾庐，敬德吊鱼。」
秦相说：「和尚，你输了一万。张飞顾庐，三顾茅庐还可以说。敬德吊鱼，鱼哪有腿？」和尚说：「甲鱼不是有四条腿？」秦相无法，又让和尚赢了一万。秦相想：「我总要想法赢他。」出来告诉秦安：「你拿个捧盒装点凉糕，你在外面等着叫和尚猜。他要猜盒子里没东西，你装着凉糕拿进去，他要猜有东西，你拿空盒子进去。」秦安点头。秦相回到里面说：「和尚，我久闻你能掐会算，善知过去未来之事。我已派家人去拿个盒子来你猜，猜盒子里有东西没有。你要猜着，我照数输给你一万银子，如猜不着，我要拆你的大碑楼。」和尚说：「大人，你输急了吧？」秦相说：「我并非是输急了，我倒要试试你的能为。」和尚喝了一杯酒，定了定神说道：
「秦大人出的主意高，这件事情真奇巧，捧盒本是空空物──」
这第三句，和尚拉着长声。秦安听和尚说是空空物，把凉糕装上拿进来。刚走进来，和尚又说道：「里面装的是凉糕。」秦安一听一愣，到底被和尚猜着。
Chancellor Qin thought, “The monk truly has a belly full of rare talent. I can’t beat him at couplets.” Only then did he say, “Monk, let’s not match couplets. Let’s play a drinking game.” “A drinking game it is, then,” said the monk. “Since it was Your Lordship’s idea, Your Lordship goes first.” “I’ll name two figures from the past and two objects,” said Chancellor Qin. “The two figures must have the same kind of face and do the same kind of thing, and they must be set on two objects, one living and one lifeless. Say one and you win; fail and you lose.” “Your Lordship first,” said the monk. “Monk, hear me out,” said Chancellor Qin. “Listen closely.
“From afar it looks like a tower,up close it looks like an ox:Lü Dongbin lies drunk in Yueyang Tower,Sun Bin, on his crutch, rides an ox.”
The monk said:
“From afar it looks like a hut,up close it looks like a fish:Zhang Fei calls at the hut,Jingde angles for a fish.”
“Monk, you’ve lost ten thousand,” said Chancellor Qin. “‘Zhang Fei calls at the hut’ — well, there were the three visits to the thatched hut, so that will pass. But ‘Jingde angles for a fish’ — since when has a fish had legs?” “Hasn’t the armoured fish got four legs?” said the monk. Chancellor Qin had no answer, and once again had to let the monk win ten thousand. “I must find some way to beat him,” Chancellor Qin thought. He went out and told Qin An, “Take a tray box and put some cool cakes in it, and wait out here while the monk guesses. If he guesses there’s nothing in the box, bring it in with the cool cakes inside. If he guesses there’s something, bring in the empty box.” Qin An nodded. Chancellor Qin went back inside. “Monk, I have long heard that you can count on your fingers and work things out, and that you know all things past and to come. I’ve sent a servant to bring in a box, and you’re to guess whether there’s anything inside. If you guess right, I lose ten thousand in silver to you as before. If you guess wrong, I pull down your Great Stele Tower.” “Your Lordship,” said the monk, “losing’s got you rattled, hasn’t it?” “I’m not rattled at all,” said Chancellor Qin. “I simply want to test your powers.” The monk drank a cup of wine, collected himself and said:
“Lord Qin has dreamed up a clever plan,this business is a rare and tricky one:the tray box holds nothing, nothing at all —”
The monk drew out this third line in a long, slow voice. Qin An heard the monk say “nothing at all”, so he put the cool cakes in and carried the box inside. Just as he came through the door, the monk went on: “and what’s inside is cool cakes.” Qin An was dumbfounded. The monk had guessed it after all.
秦相想：「天也不早了，給兒子去治病要緊。」想完說：「和尚，你的酒如何？可以吃飯，給我兒去治病？」和尚說：「我已然酒足飯飽。哎呀！你們給我找著藥沒有？」眾家人說：「我等趴在地上把鼻子都粘好些土，也沒找著。」和尚一伸手掏出一個包，說：「我這有點藥料，再加兩味藥就成了。」秦相接過來一看，上面的字太草率，看不出來。打開一看，白的很，李懷春一看，認得原本是吃的白麵，問：「和尚，此是甚麼？」濟公說：「這叫多磨多羅多波羅散。」秦相說：「還有甚麼東西？」和尚說：「朱砂一兩，白麵四兩，盒子一個，用開水一沖，又用刷子一把。」秦相吩咐趕忙照樣預備。家人答應。少時，回報相爺，所有應用的東西俱已齊備。和尚方纔放下盃筷，隨同秦相直奔書齋。羅漢爺便大施佛法，來治大頭瓮，度化秦桓。
秦相想：「天也不早了，给儿子去治病要紧。」想完说：「和尚，你的酒如何？可以吃饭，给我儿去治病？」和尚说：「我已然酒足饭饱。哎呀！你们给我找着药没有？」众家人说：「我等趴在地上把鼻子都粘好些土，也没找着。」和尚一伸手掏出一个包，说：「我这有点药料，再加两味药就成了。」秦相接过来一看，上面的字太草率，看不出来。打开一看，白的很，李怀春一看，认得原本是吃的白面，问：「和尚，此是甚么？」济公说：「这叫多磨多罗多波罗散。」秦相说：「还有甚么东西？」和尚说：「朱砂一两，白面四两，盒子一个，用开水一冲，又用刷子一把。」秦相吩咐赶忙照样预备。家人答应。少时，回报相爷，所有应用的东西俱已齐备。和尚方才放下杯筷，随同秦相直奔书斋。罗汉爷便大施佛法，来治大头瓮，度化秦桓。
“It’s getting late,” Chancellor Qin thought. “Treating my son is what matters.” With that he said, “Monk, how’s your wine? Ready for some rice, and then to go and treat my son?” “I’ve already had my fill of wine and food,” said the monk. “Oh no! Have you lot found my medicine for me?” “We crawled about on the floor till our noses were caked with dirt,” said the servants, “and still didn’t find it.” The monk reached in and pulled out a packet. “I’ve got a few ingredients here. Add two more and it’ll be ready.” Chancellor Qin took it and looked. The writing on it was too scrawled to make out. He opened it: something very white. Li Huaichun took a look and recognized it as plain wheat flour, the kind people eat. “Monk, what is this?” he asked. “This is called Much-Grinding Duoluo Duoboluo Powder,” said Ji Gong. “What else do you need?” said Chancellor Qin. “One tael of cinnabar,” said the monk, “four taels of white flour and a box. Stir it up with boiling water. And a brush as well.” Chancellor Qin ordered everything got ready at once, just as the monk said. The servants answered. Shortly afterwards they reported to His Excellency that everything needed was ready. Only then did the monk put down his cup and chopsticks and go straight with Chancellor Qin to the study. Lord Arhat would now put forth his Buddhist powers in full to cure the Big-Head Jar and bring Qin Huan to salvation.
不知後事如何，且看下回分解。
不知后事如何，且看下回分解。
To learn what happened next, read the next chapter.